WHAT FREEDOM REALLY MEANS (TO A REPUBLICAN)

• Freedom to climb the economic ladder, removing rungs as you go to preserve your position at the top.
• Freedom to use slave labor.
• Freedom to not have health care, and freedom from acknowledging that health care is a human right.
• Freedom to headquarter your business in the Caymans.
• Freedom to crush the unions.
• Freedom to shift environmental costs downstream.
• Freedom to loan money at usurious rates worldwide.
• Freedom to take away other people’s freedom.
• Freedom to deny women their rights.
• Freedom to make America a nation for Christians-only — or get out!
• Freedom to deny free lunches to freeloader children.
• Freedom to front-run the market.
• Freedom to shoot other people.